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After reading Elite Daily's "11 signs you are really fucking good at being socially awkward" I figured I'll come up with a list myself, since I've got my fair share of experience. I don't usually go out much and when I do, at times I really hit it off well with people but there are also a number of times that I get really, really awkward --- it's embarrassing.
And you'll know if you're like me when you do the following:
When recently introduce to a new set of people, you forget their names instantly.
You shake their hands and pronounce there name: "Hi, ___" but after saying it once, you completely forget about it. After minutes of chit chat you feel silly for making a new friend, whose name you don't even know. And since you really wanted to be friends with them and maintain contact, you ask their names again.
When conversation is taking off between you and 6 more people, and you find yourself not knowledgeable about the topic. You just stare at them and look dumb, and then dumber.
Your eyes would be like ping pong balls moving from one person to the other because that's just the least thing you can do to create the illusion that you're still with them. And to at least, participate you throw in a couple of nods, and blurt out "yes", when in fact you don't have a clue what they're talking about, and you would then feel dumber, and look dumber, so you just drool and swallow saliva, all that with your ping pong eye balls
When with a group that you recently get to know, you tend to act like a chicken without feathers.
Yeah sure you know some tricks to look confident. Fake it till you make it remember. The only problem is, you are oozing with awkwardness that you standing with both feet apart and with arms widely open and hands on your hips -- which supposed to give you an illusion of power -- would just make you look like an old lady with her hands on her hips, and with her adult diaper on, with only her adult diaper on.
When you try to suggest a venue to the group, you say it so boringly that you can put crickets to sleep.
"So guys I know this place down the street, I heard it's cool there." You say that sheepishly and nervously your last words would go inaudible. You just wasted your time and spent it by further proclaiming that you're indeed a freak.
When walking with them, you walk like you have a woodboard at your back.
Ok so you feel tense, it's pretty obvious by the way you walk and how your shoulders are way up high that it almost touches your ear lobes. You may not know you've been doing it the whole time until the next morning. You'd feel shoulder pains and wonder where you got it from.
When you're trying to start a conversation with someone, you don't start.
You try too hard to figure out what to say that you didn't notice that it had been already minutes. Starting your conversation long after when you supposed to start one, doesn't make any sense at all so you just decide to shut up and do things that would look like you're having a ball like you whistle, you sing under your breath, you hum, you look away at the dark alley at the corner and look at it like it's Superbowl's half time show.
When being in a conversation with someone your interest wanes down to a set of 2 front teeth.
Ok so you smile and nod because you want the other person to think that you're interested, and maybe because you really find the conversation interesting, well for the first 5 minutes that is. After that you get bored, and not contribute to the discussion at all. The only contribution you have is your 2 front teeth, ready to bite off the lips of a very boring and self absorbed person in front of you.
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