I am back!

I haven't been writing for awhile now and I have come to miss it.  As I am touching my keyboard again, dancing through the beat of my thought and heart, I noticed that I want more of this.  This jiving of heart, mind, hands to give birth to a story.  I've miss this.  I missed it enough that I am romanticizing this art form, enough that I am making this whole thing poetic, and somehow OA even.  But I don't care.  I miss this.

I miss me spilling my thoughts out on screen, me just completing my sentences, thoughts, ideas, and finding my lips crack a smile, a satisfaction that I have made myself come out there.

That I have expressed myself out in the open.

I'll end it right here before I make this whole thing over the top.

But darn it, I miss this!

Publisher: Shy - Friday, June 23, 2017

An Epiphany at 3am

It's 3:04am.  Everybody is asleep and the only noise I could hear is the blowing of the fan and the barking of neighborhood dogs.

I woke up because of a dream.  Without spilling information, I have found my answer through it.  Although I am well aware of what the truth his, somehow my consciousness forces in a fantasy on how I wished things should be.  The infamous what could have beens, and what if's.  I understand it's a total waste of thought space, time and emotions to be thinking about these things, but somehow these thoughts had gotten my heart hooked, tied and lock down.  Is there any way I could get away with this easier?  

And then an epiphany landed on me easily, comfortably and cleanly, immediately after all the rundowns of thoughts on regrets.  This practice of walking down memory lane and skimming through the ifs and buts are nothing but distraction.  It robs me of resources that I need to have to get myself moving forward and in purpose.  It could be, what they say, a work of the enemy.  And so I before I would immerse myself over an idea, I would have to ask myself 3 things: if it serves me, if it serves God, if it serves mankind.  If it's not, then it's a total waste of my time.  

I just thought of sharing this to you before I forget it.  I'm literally typing with my eyes half closed.  So I guess that's it.  I'll doze off again.

Publisher: Shy - Thursday, June 01, 2017

Lost and Found

Lost and found.

My destination was  an art gallery found at a corner of 2 streets, that was all I know and that was all the information I had to lead me there.  I went on taking the bus that my bro-in-law told me to take.  I told the conductor to drop me to the place I intended to drop off.  Advised by my seatmate, he nudged me telling me to go down because we have reached the place I was telling him about, and confirming from the yells of the conductor, I went down the bus.  But I knew even upon entering the corner a few minutes ago that I wasn't in the right place, this was confirmed by the candy seller, tricycle driver and van shuttle caller.  They don't know the place where I wanted to go.  So the guard from the bank nearby asked me to go to the overpass because near there was a barangay station and people there could teach me where to go.  So I grabbed my 11"x16" framed art and went down the street for a 5 minute walk towards the station.  Inside I saw 3 men sitting down on plastic chairs and at the corner there was a man at the desk, whom I would be asking directions from.  He then phoned another barangay station as the place I was going to wasn't part of his terrirtory.  Over the other line was a 40-ish year old woman, telling me to go to the gate, and hop off the jeep at a certain point, I found myself scribbling hurriedly on my notepad, and just to be sure, repeated to her what she just said.  So when all was noted and right, I thank the lady, put down the phone and thank the guy at the desk.  I went up the street again from where the candy seller was at and got a jeep there to take me to my destination.  I dropped off, crossed the street with a woman and her little girl.  Got inside the gallery and submitted my art.  Heading outside, I still didn't know how to get home so I then asked a tricycle driver for directions, upon asking, another driver rallied over to what the other driver was saying.  They both said to get the jeep which would take me to the highway and I did.  I then paid the jeepney driver and went down the highway along with a handful of passengers, walked a few distance and snuggled under the shed of the tree.  I saw the jeep that would take me home, hopped in, dropped off and walked home from there.

You see, I had been through a lot of people, for what I thought was just a simple errand of going to the gallery and going home.   It was far more twisted than I could have imagined, and a trip that I thought would only take me less than 2 hours took me almost 3 hours to accomplished, but I didn't complain.  Not a bit.  Frustrated?  Not at all.  Anxious?  No, never.  Getting lost in a place that I haven't been to, getting lost under the extreme heat of the sun, getting lost while it's hot and smoke belched out was clouding up my lungs, for sure those would probably upset me.  But, you see,  I didn't really got bothered by it all, for what really, truly appeared to me was that people from all sorts of background were there to help me readily, willingly with concern and care.  They even asked others for directions for me.  I felt guided, safe, and above all loved.  For me, the simple errand of submitting my artwork was a journey of love.   By being lost, I found His love through these people who had helped me find my way. 

Publisher: Shy - Friday, March 17, 2017

Foreigners Edition: How To Be A Volunteer in the Philippines for FREE or for a Very Affordable Price

Volunteer in the Philippines

I've been researching on how I could volunteer in Nepal and Vietnam and it pains me to see that some if not most of the NGO's charge a certain amount of money.  Some are quite expensive, and some are reasonably cheap.  I'm wondering if some foreigners are also interested in doing the same here in my country.  Judging from what I have seen in NGO websites, I'm sure there are interested as well.  From what I know, anyone can freely volunteer here.  You just have to inform the NGO ahead of time.  Some of them would ask you to undergo an orientation so if you're staying a bit longer, do take the time to join the orientation.  If there are any dues involve it would just be really small, say P50 to P250.  The rest of donations would really be up to you.  Bring stuff in kind or bring money, what matters most is your presence and how you could share your time in making a difference in other people's lives.

Here are some NGO's that you could volunteer for free or for a very minimal charge.

1.  iVolunteer - This is a volunteer hub where you could choose from various NGOs.  They have lists of scheduled events, so you could check which one speaks to you the most.

2. Nursing Homes - If caring for the elderly is what you seek, then you could access a list of nursing homes and contact them so you could set an appointment or orientation of some sort.

3.  Orphanage -  This one is a hit for some volunteers.  Activities included are feeding, teaching, and playing games with orphaned or abandoned children.  Most of these orphanages are connected to Department of Social Welfare and Development.  Orientations are given by a trained staff.  Try contacting them for any inquiries.

4. NGO's for environment - Volunteer activities aren't held often as the previous items on the list.  They usually ask volunteers as needed and you have to undergo training which don't happen as often too.  So if you think of staying in the Philippines longer, then go ahead and sign up.  Make sure that you'll know the dates for registration and for training.

5. For Animals - I only knows PAWS which task in helping abandoned dogs and cats, and giving them a shelter and food and practically a safe place for them to stay.  The animals here are all on standby for adoption.  Again they have a scheduled orientation so make sure you check it.  Just a heads up, they'll be having an orientation on the 16th of August 2016 so make sure you get in touch with them and block your calendar on that date.

So see, you don't have to pay a lot if you wish to volunteer here in the Philippines.  Pick an organization and do some goodwill.

Publisher: Shy - Friday, August 05, 2016

My First Art Exhibit at Matt Mason Gallery, Silang, Cavite Tagaytay

Sister and brother-in-law at the gallery

I think I got lucky on this one.  If this is a result of my new-found law of attraction practice, then I don't know what it is.  Just earlier this year, I've decided to get serious on painting.  And so I started applying for galleries, and lo and behold, it wasn't long that there was an open opportunity waiting for me at Silang, Cavite, Tagaytay.

And so I grabbed the chance by the horns, and found my way in it.  My fondness for painting hasn't really reached to my fondness of eating chocolate.  It's not something that I desire, although I wish to be the case so I would continually practice painting.  I just grab the brush when I feel like practicing.  It's not totally a a freeing in the sense that you still have to make good art.  It takes discipline to make sense of what you just made in a way that it better looks nice.  It is really easy to get lost in the flow and mess up what you have made because you were in the zone.  Some artist would think that as long as it's abstract, you could never go wrong.  Well at some point that's true, but it takes discipline to direct your energy and creativity in a way that's beautiful.  In the end of it all, creating artwork is just trying to explore possibilities, making a mess and trying to fix it so it would all look like a masterpiece.  It's just a bit like life, but on canvas.

Publisher: Shy - Saturday, July 30, 2016

Sh*t People Say or do to Solo Female Travelers

1.  "Oh So why are you alone?" and then give you the pity face.

2. Don't you have a boyfriend or a friend to go with you?

3.  Oh so you have traveled for more than a week now.  What do you do? Do you even have a job?

4.  Okay a table.  For 1 person, right?

5. Eating alone at Mcdonalds.  People stare at you like.

6. You're sitting or standing alone at a foreign country and people be like...

Publisher: Shy - Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Tea Party with Friends: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

When I said I'll set up a tea party, I meant it.  

My friends from Davao were going to celebrate their birthdays together and invited me over to attend.  I was in Manila that time so I can't possibly heed to the request.  Although I could, but since due to timing and all, I couldn't pull it through.  So to make it up to them, and to have my tea party dream come true.  I've put the 2 together and viola, I hit 2 birds at one time.

The good things are ethereal theme I had going; the silk, and pink satins, the pink rose, the petals of roses trailing towards the set up, the cookies, cakes and biscuits, all propped tastefully on top of a high table with a golden frame with my hand written definition of a goddess:

The bad are there's nothing really bad about it. Well perhaps the whole situation was not at par from my expectations but that's really how life is right?  I was planning more ethereal, but that was only what I could come up with, but hey at least I tried.

The ugly part is well the stories.  Our party started 5pm and ended at 9.  What was planned to be an ethereal goddess party, was meant to empower them to see the goddess that they are.  But I guess I didn't execute it that well.  Serving tea, sweets and posting goddess definition wouldn't really make them feel empowered yeah?  But it was a great setting for them to open up.  It was a therapy, a release.  Something that they needed.  Something that we all need.  And I was glad that we were all there as a group of sisterhood, supporting each other in times of the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Publisher: Shy - Friday, March 25, 2016

Why I Still Want to Travel to do Soul Searching Even After I Swear I Wouldn't

source

I have eaten my words, yet again. 

 Here's the beauty of it.  Life is full of contrasts. People like opposite things, and it just depends upon the time or situation in which thing prevails.   I'll give you a context of that last post.  I was set to do soul searching in Hongkong at the same time explore the place.  I think given that situation, I had set myself out to fail.  I didn't have time to think about myself thus no time for soul searching. 

Apart from that I have dipped my finger into some meditation practices in the hopes that I would finally grab hold of my emotions.  All though in retrospect it did help me get in touch with myself more, which was well and good.

There are just some times that being stuck in the same place just takes you back to your old beaten path, your old way of thinking and seeing things.  Moving to places and getting stimulated in all possible ways just gives you a different light, thus different road to self discovery.  

It takes a different shift to help you get out of the cage.  And maybe that's why traveling works for me.  It may not give me the answers that I'm hoping for but it would give me the energy and inspiration to work into my dreams and pursue it.

And I think that's not bad at all.  

Publisher: Shy - Monday, September 14, 2015

Why I Stopped Traveling to Do Soul-Searching.

Introspection.  Reflection: Pic Source 

"We go on in life always busy looking out and yet failing to look in.  When we spend time with ourselves with our thoughts and energy, we dig deep, we recognize where our heart truly goes."

I couldn't count the times that I've attempted to find my purpose through travels and every
time I've come home to one, I would bring home the usual:  a few souvenirs, a number of really cool stories, and hundreds of pictures.  And also as usual, I come home with no clear conviction of the purpose.  The whole trip although it was fun, didn't really give me the answer which I was seeking for in the first place.  Why?

Why it Failed.

During my first solo trip in HK, I filled my itinerary with places to go, things to buy, activities to do, thinking that being in a different place would highlight my own difference, seeing myself freshly and genuinely in the light of other people.  I believed that me being genuine, comfortable in my own skin, and being different would help me understand myself more.  I would see clearly the unique in me as seen by others, believing also that by knowing myself more and being happy with it, my purpose would somehow arise.  All those were true though, except that "my purpose" didn't pop up as I hoped it would.  No light bulbs happened.

And by being in different place made stillness and introspection for long hours of time seem impractical.  I mean, there I was in Baguio or HK, places I have never been to.  Every time I steady myself and start to meditate, there's a nagging thought that yells at me saying that "there's just so much to explore in this place, what the hell are you doing?"  or the "you spent all money and time for that? might as well do that in your own room."  And dawning on the fact, I get anxious and go back to my places-to-go list.

So there, I learned it that way, but I must say that each experience is different.  My soul searching just happened to flop when traveling because really come to think of it the answer really lies within us.  We go on in life always busy looking out and yet failing to look in.  When we spend time with ourselves with our thoughts and energy, we dig deep, we recognize where our heart truly goes.

Take Away 

I learned that our aspirations and dreams are shadows of the needs and wants that we want in life.  There are shallow needs, the ones that we really don't need but we have come to want for the ego.  And there are deeper needs of love, belonging, fulfillment which we get by pursuing that of which our spirit truly desires.  It's up for us to recognize where our dreams fall under, and to make sure that we always go for the ones that fall under the latter. 

Publisher: Shy - Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Shutting Up That Nagging Ugly Thought-Source

reshareit

"The more you listen and follow it, the more you're giving it power to take over your kingdom."

I've been trying to get in touch with my inner self recently, after realizing that in order for me to master myself, I need to first master my inner world.  And much to my defeat, I see myself faltering, eating one marshmallow to another.  Why marshmallow?

The Marshmallow Test

Well I've learned that the single most effective way in determining ones success is through the marshmallow test.  It's a test wherein kids are given a marshmallow only to be told not to eat it.  Basically it is a test of self discipline and self control. No matter what preparation, and introspection you do, it will all become useless, worthless, if you're not able to implement and follow through your plans and learning.

And now I see myself having to face marshmallows in the form of mango rolled cake in the freezer when I'm trying to loose 5 kilograms, or the bed during a spanish session, or that red number in facebook that notifies me to check the message when I'm trying to finish an article.  We see it all in various forms. And like a muscle, the more we resist it the more we make our discipline muscle stronger.

I realized that no matter how I tried to resist there's this nagging voice that gives me a list of reasons why I should just submit.  It rationalizes with me, it justifies until the argument becomes strong and I weak, then the inevitable happens and I submit.

There's the inner voice and there's You

What I also learned in studying spirituality is that the thought that we have is not us.  And that who we really are is that silence, that knowing, that space.  I understand it is abstract that's why it is difficult to comprehend.  It let's you separate that inner voice and you.   The inner voice who isn't so friendly most of the time.  It's your narcissistic fan that blows up your ego a hundred fold and at the same time, too often than not, your vile critic who shrinks it with a stabbing comment, which you would mistakenly believe as truth.

How your Mind-om would Look like

If we are to put faces in these characters in our mind and see how our mind-om would look like.  The inner voice would be that ugly, gollum-like jest who is the noisiest of them all.  There's your right-hand handsome duke who is a man of few words but wisdom and good-will always comes out of him.  And there's you on the throne, a mum ethereal beauty of a queen who just sees and observes and listens to all these happening.  In your royal status, why would you listen to that ugly jest?  He is nothing but one big joke after all.  A scum who does nothing but plant weeds in your garden, throws trash in your hall.  The more you listen and follow it, the more you're giving it power to take over your kingdom.  Understand that it has no power over you, and with this it is your responsibility to uphold beauty and peace in your kingdom, which is the way it should be.

With this way of looking it, I hope I get to shut the joke of a jest and focus on enriching my kingdom.  And maybe by that, we won't be accepting nonsense from people, because you would not accept nonsense in you. We may start setting high standard for ourselves.  Why accept anything less? We're all a queen afterall.

Publisher: Shy - Sunday, July 05, 2015

Learning from the Dog Whisperer.

 Source: dailymail

Youtube has a weird way of leading you  from Oprah to life hacks down to Japanese blowing flour out of his butt hole.  I've had some good straight clean days and I've had some crazy ones too.  But at this particular day,  I unconsciously found myself sticking to one theme: Dogs.  It all started with a video of an English Bulldog insisting on sitting in a cardboard box that is way too small for him then spiraled my way down to watching Dog whisperer.

I've watched dozens of episodes of Dog whisperer, viewing one 45 minute- long video after another.  It was all too fascinating to see how these howling, misbehaved and out-of-control canines would just succumb to his command, even on the first day.   How could one person who these dogs have seen for a few minutes would have such power over them and would behave 10 times better than to their own family whom they've known practically all their life.  Now there's probably some hocus pocus going on here, or some behind-the-scene acting that we don't know.  But as I've had watched a number of videos, it occurred to me that this man is the real deal.   He just have these tricks in his sleeves that he got from years of experience around dogs, and in his shows he gets to apply these as we see it.  The tricks and principles have been repeated show after show that my fascination had pale on me the more I watch it. The concepts had bored me for hearing it countless times, but I am well aware how powerful these are when applied.

Here are the principles that I want to share with you all.

1.  Energy.  I've heard Cesar Millan, the Dog whisperer himself, drop this word plenty of times.  If you want to influence a dog, you need to give off a calm and assertive energy. These are the qualities of a pack leader.  When the pack leader does something, everyone in the pack follows.  That's how great the influence and power they have.  This also holds true for humans.  We follow a leader who is calm, confident and assertive.  Energy like that is powerful. People follow someone who exerts power, not someone who plays a victim.

2. Being in the now, I noticed gives you more energy and concentration that you don't have when you are stuck up in the past and anxious of the future.  It's sad that many people live like so, that's why they don't get anything done, and if so, the quality is not there. 

3.  The power of influence.  Training dogs for years had left Cesar unfazed on each growls, howls, bites that he's faced with.  Despite these threats he managed to keep the energy of superiority, calmness and strength.  But there are some cases which are exceptions.  These are the ones that, no matter how he hand bite,  and topple down stubborn dogs, his powers and tools wouldn't just work.  This is where "Daddy", his ever trusted pitbull, comes in and saves the day as well as his owner's face.  Such serene display of energy despite aggression of an opposing dog just falls into deaf ears with Daddy.  While the other dog relays excitement, he just displays boredom, irresponsive behavior,  In doing so, lowers the energy of the other.

To summarize the key concepts behind the trick is that it all boils down to Energy.  The focus, calm, assertive, positive energy always gets the job done.

Now if I could try to apply it to myself, it would probably sky rocket my quality of life.

Publisher: Shy - Tuesday, April 28, 2015

7 Signs you are Really Fucking Good at Being Socially Awkward

Image Source: guycodeblog

After reading Elite Daily's  "11 signs you are really fucking good at being socially awkward" I figured I'll come up with a list myself, since I've got my fair share of experience.  I don't usually go out much and when I do, at times I really hit it off well with people but there are also a number of times that I get really, really awkward --- it's embarrassing.

And you'll know if you're like me when you do the following:

When recently introduce to a new set of people, you forget their names instantly. 

You shake their hands and pronounce there name: "Hi, ___"  but after saying it once, you completely forget about it.  After minutes of chit chat you feel silly for making a new friend, whose name you don't even know.  And since you really wanted to be friends with them and maintain contact, you ask their names again.

When conversation is taking off between you and 6 more people, and you find yourself not knowledgeable about the topic.  You just stare at them and look dumb, and then dumber.

Your eyes would be like ping pong balls moving from one person to the other because that's just the least thing you can do to create the illusion that you're still with them.  And to at least, participate you throw in a couple of nods, and blurt out "yes", when in fact you don't have a clue what they're talking about, and you would then feel dumber, and look dumber, so you just drool and swallow saliva, all that with your ping pong eye balls

When with a group that you recently get to know, you tend to act like a chicken without feathers.

Yeah sure you know some tricks to look confident.  Fake it till you make it remember.  The only problem is, you are oozing with awkwardness that you standing with both feet apart and with arms widely open and hands on your hips -- which supposed to give you an illusion of power -- would just make you look like an old lady with her hands on her hips, and with her adult diaper on, with only her adult diaper on.

When you try to suggest a venue to the group, you say it so boringly that you can put crickets to sleep.

"So guys I know this place down the street, I heard it's cool there."  You say that sheepishly and nervously your last words would go inaudible.  You just wasted your time and spent it by further proclaiming that you're indeed a freak.

When walking with them, you walk like you have a woodboard at your back.

Ok so you feel tense, it's pretty obvious by the way you walk and how your shoulders are way up high that it almost touches your ear lobes.  You may not know you've been doing it the whole time until the next morning.  You'd feel shoulder pains and wonder where you got it from.

When you're trying to start a conversation with someone, you don't start.

You try too hard to figure out what to say that you didn't notice that it had been already minutes.  Starting your conversation long after when you supposed to start one, doesn't make any sense at all so you just decide to shut up and do things that would look like you're having a ball like you whistle, you sing under your breath, you hum, you look away at the dark alley at the corner and look at it like it's Superbowl's half time show.

Image Source: giphy

When being in a conversation with someone your interest wanes down to a set of 2 front teeth.

Ok so you smile and nod because you want the other person to think that you're interested, and maybe because you really find the conversation interesting, well for the first 5 minutes that is.  After that you get bored, and not contribute to the discussion at all.  The only contribution you have is your 2 front teeth, ready to bite off the lips of a very boring and self absorbed person in front of you.

So here's my list and I've totally ticked all 7.  All 7 base on experience.  You probably have yours too.  Mind sharing? :)

Publisher: Shy - Monday, February 02, 2015

5 First thing-in-the-morning to-do's to Start Your Day Right.

Image Source: huffingtonpost

There could be plenty of things that goes in our brain as soon as we wake up, that or nothing at all.  If I'm not mistaken, we most likely think about what we need to be doing today.  Our deadlines, our reports, what to serve for breakfast and all the factors that demands attention from us.

Here are 5 things that you should do to make to make life better:

1.  Whisper the affirmation: Another day, another chance to make it better.  It's true that everyday is another opportunity to give dreams a chance to be acted upon or even thought of, give more clarity, shape and details to it.  The more we think about it, the more we slowly convince ourselves that this could be our calling.

2. Asking yourself life-provoking questions:  What am I here to do? How can I contribute more goodness in this world?  It's hard to think of ourselves as dead, so it is difficult to sink in the truth that our time is limited.  Unless you experience loosing a loved one, had a brush with death, you will never get to appreciate the time that you're living.

3. Breath in.  Countless of studies have proven that just the mere act of breathing in does wonders for the soul.  Come on, try it now and see for yourself what wonders I'm talking about.  And you're welcome.

4. Pray.  You don't have to be a part of  religious group to do this, nor do you have to composed one long prayer.  Just saying "thank you" is a prayer in itself.  

5. Stretch.  It loosens up the joints and get the blood running faster for just a few seconds. It has the same basic concept as with breathing.

Here are my 5 to-do's that works for me to start off my day right.  What's yours?

Publisher: Shy - Sunday, February 01, 2015

10 Great Things About Being Single

I have been single for a few years now and I remembered that for the most part, I was longing for a companion.  I was longing to be in a relationship again.  And whenever I am in a relationship, I've had thoughts that I was happier when I was single.  It seems now that I've never been satisfied of where I am. Longing for better, happier, bigger, richer robs me of the joy of the present.  So I've vowed to be happy and contented, irregardless of the relationship status or bank account.  Slowly, I've come to learn this.  Slowly, I've come to love the process.

Thinking of that now, I've come to realize that being single isn't really that bad after all.  I've come to embrace the joy that I remembered having before getting this in sticky situation called relationship.

1.  Freedom to go anywhere I want, anytime.  If you plan to go somewhere, you wouldn't need to ask permission to anyone (given that you're of age), other than my parents of course.  And when you're at it, you wouldn't have to feel in a hurry to go home because "you're missing someone".

2.  No Drama.  The only drama that would occur are when pimples start appearing on your nose, lost cellphones, problems at work, and gaining that 5 kilograms over Christmas.

3.  Low battery?  No problem.   No one's going to text you that much anyway apart from friends of course.  You wouldn't have to load all the time too.  The only time it goes  low bat is after 4 days of using and not using it.  That's it.

4.  More girl bonding.  What's more fun than being with your girls and spending more time with them doing anything from fabulous to the silliest of things.  Building this bond would not only support your sisterhood, it also makes your life a lot more colorful and exciting.

5.  Focus on Career.  This is the best time for you to fly high and pursue those dreams that have been staying too long on your bucket list.  Work in another city and learn the ropes of the job and of living in a new place.  While in it, get more friends, and network like crazy.

6.  You can network like crazy.  No one would ask you who this guy is and why have you added him on facebook.  With you being available, you can network to as many kinds of people as possible.  Choose the ones who would give more value to your life and the ones who would give you that much needed leverage that would take you a step closer to your dreams.

7.  Eat whatever you want and not feel guilty about it.  Of course, it's also true when you're in a relationship.  But with you being single, you wouldn't have to worry if someone had noticed that extra pounds you gained because you spent your entire weekend emotional eating.

8. Have time to Reinvent Self.  Although this is also possible when you are in a healthy relationship, it's just easier when you're single because there isn't any resistance from you or from a special someone.  When you're tied up with a guy, you would second guess if he likes it or not.  If you're single, you can go as extreme as you want.

9.  More time to do what you want alone.  If painting and reading is your passion.  You have plenty of time indulging in these creative and mind stimulating pursuits.  There wouldn't be an urge to check on your cellphone to see if your guy messaged you or not.

10. Date as many guys as you want.  Meet different guys from different backgrounds and see who suits you the best.

Publisher: Shy - Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Moving Forward on Being 30

It has been more than a month since I turned 30 and ever since then I feel more in tune with myself.  Knowing more that I'm indeed a woman or at least what I hope I'll be.  Is it late for me to think of this?  Or maybe why just now that I've got this womanly thought in mind? Is it because I overindulged in the wallows and wonders of being carefree and just having fun which for me is just hanging out, riding through the current, just staring blankly at the horizon, looking at the sides, up and front again.  You know how you search Facebook mindlessly pulling you to click this, and that, and next thing you know hours has already passed.  Many great read, few friends you've touched based with again, from up and down the scroll you've gone through countless times. Nothing really has been achieved, nothing that would really moved you forward in life.  And that's really how I've been probably how I've spent a portion of my life on the past years.  Checking stuff, peeking into it and moving on to the next cool stuff.  It was entertaining and sometimes boring, but yet I never fail to get distracted.  There's a lot of interesting things out there that I'd want to spend my time just poking on to it.

Now that I've turned 30, I've slowly feel the urge to paddle my own way around and go see things that I really wanted to see rather than just seeing what is appearing before me.  While that sounds exciting it's pretty colossal to go places where you know that there are tons of them that you want to see.  So then I'm still learning to stay focus, and accept that not everything in life I can experience. I'll just have to trudge a way that I want to be my life, no poking on other routes anymore, just looking ahead, moving forward, and staying there.

Publisher: Shy - Monday, January 26, 2015

Magic and Romance in Wisdom Path, Lantau Hongkong?

It was Dec. 6, 2014.  The day that I turned 29.  It was morning.  I was cold and tired after a long walk around the Giant Buddha, and even after that, I was still determined to power through to see the Wisdom Path.  My journey to the Wisdom path wasn't so enlightening.  It was just a very narrow path that's just formed by people waking on it for years. I'd say people lining up and walking along it, because that's how narrow it is, or at least that's how I perceived it too be.  My fear screwed up my reality that what I was seeing as a long, narrow brick road seemed to me like a scene in the Blair Witch project.

I'd second guessed myself a number of times if I was indeed walking on the right path.  I even went back as far as where the sign was and, even when there was a sign pointing on there implying that the path that I had been trudging is indeed the way,  I still asked some locals where the path is and with a reassuring nod I then head on once more.  It didn't took me long to have my doubts creep in again.  In my head I was thinking, what if there's some kind of puma hiding in the bushes, waiting for the perfect timing to pounce on me. What if there's some rapist around the corner seamlessly looking for a lone female travel a.k.a. me.  That freaked me out and turned away again.   

I'm not a psycho, but any woman with a sane mind would feel vulnerable walking down the path.  It was long and narrow and it's smack in the middle of a forest.  It would have been fine if I was with a crowd of people, but in this case, I was on it alone, and being a tourist spot I was expecting people if not going with me at least heading at the opposite direction, but while I was at it for what seemed like minutes, I didn't see anyone, which scared me.  So it could be a perfect place for a malicious person to drag me into the bushes without being seen by anyone.  And to remind you, I'm on this trip alone, so if I'll be missing, no one will notice.  So it was imperative to take extra, extra, caution.  So I had to dismissed it.

Listen, this Wisdom Path isn't worth my life!!! 

Good thing I saw an american family on their way to my supposed destination.  I asked the guy carrying a baby if I was in the right way to the Wisdom Path.  He confirmed what I already supposed to know, yet refused to accept.  Shamelessly I asked if I could go with them because I was too scared walking alone.

When we finally reached the site, he told me "See we're right all along.", in my mind he'd probably think I'm a weirdo.  And so you know how many times my mind had screwed up with me through my trip.  I said "Thank you." and walked my way up to the Wisdom Path, leaving them behind as they were sitting under a tree, resting.  

Images Source: ilovehongkong

There I saw another American travel talking to an asian traveler,  as the asian traveler left, we were the only ones there as I reached the middle part of the whole installation.  It wasn't long before we started a conversation.

His name was Frank, age 54.  Like how any conversation starts, we said our his and hellos, and then he pointed out that the writings etched on the wooden beams, explaining to me that those were Buddhist Sutras or prayers.  And like with any traveler meeting a new traveler, the "where are you from?" question was asked.  When I said Philippines, he then beamed and said

"Oh I've been to the Philippines before, I've volunteered at the peace corps...." hearing this I felt mesmerized and honored that he has been to my country, and felt deaf as I was thinking all these, and next thing I heard was...

"You know it's weird because the reason why I'm here is because of the Philippines."

We then looked at each other and had a second to contemplate EVERYTHING.

Ok we're smacked at the center of  Wisdom Path with us being there alone. Alone, while we were surrounded with so much mist and mystery.  And here this man, is talking about how the Philippines is the reason why he is in HK, and I am a Filipina.  

"What does this supposed to mean?"

This seemed like the perfect set up for a romantic love story, then violins and orchestra started pouring in.  

But wait what is this. No. Is this the universe playing tricks on us?  What's with this coincidence and with the ambiance.  Ok sir, but no.  And universe, stop it, this isn't funny.  And he probably thinks the same thing too.  And for a brief moment right there, we were back to traveler meeting traveler mode.  And bid our goodbyes soon after.

Funny how things sometimes seem right even momentarily and and then seemed entirely wrong at the blink of an eye.  Sometimes things aren't meant to be thought of deeply.  Sometimes things are just what they really are and nothing more.

I went on back again to the path I was freaking about not too long ago.  This time with the smirk on my face..."What the hell was that?"  Oh well. Moving on.

Publisher: Shy - Wednesday, January 21, 2015

I Missed my Flight!

They say that you haven't traveled that much, if you haven't missed out your flight.  

You may ask where I got that, well I made it up myself.  Sure some people haven't experienced missing out their flight despite of traveling to a lot of destinations.  That's well and good.  But I just happened to be among the people who have missed their flight.   

There are a number of reasons why it happens.  One major reason is because of tardiness.  They got to the airport few minutes after the airport personal closes the gate.  Second could be that they are already in the airport but just had slept the whole time until alas the plane left them, or they may be too caught up with eating or chitchatting or just going around the airport that they didn't notice the time and alas, the plane left them.  In my case though, for some reason I have read the time on my boarding pass wrongly.  For some reason, I was seeing 2:15PM there.  For some reason, I was believing that I'll be leaving at 2:15PM.  Now can someone tell me how the hell did I come up with that? Was it some kind of a brain glitch?  That my eyes and brain didn't coordinate well that I was seeing a 2 there instead of a 6?  Now I may be a nurse but I can't seem to come up with a possible scientific diagnosis for this kind of symptom.  But I know the layman's term for this alright... CUTE.

Publisher: Shy - Sunday, December 21, 2014

Visiting Rizal in Calamba

The clock is 15minutes past 12noon, and I'm still in the bus going to Los Banos, my destination for the day.  It took me some time to get myself out of the house and go on my way.  Blame it on my indecisiveness.  Let's just say I had already decided to go and present, there was this part of me which preferred to just stay at home.  I wasn't all in the idea.   It was just a bonus anyway, and I had already passed the presentation the night before.  So I took my time changing up my top, putting on another layer of powder. and left 30 minutes before the time that I should have been there.  So what happened? I didn't make it.  The presentation was from 10:30am to 12noon.

No point on going all the way to Los Banos then, so I figured to just go down at Calamba and drop off SM Calamba.  A number of passengers went down the bus already, I figured I should too.  The bus door closes and was moving far away from it.  I should go down then and walk my way back to SM.  Then it was already blocks away.  So I told myself, I'd go down the next mall.  I saw Puregold at the left side of the National Highway, but it looked so small, there wasn't much to see there, then thankfully at the right, I saw Figaro. Perfect! I got down just few meters away from the guy who intended to go down at Puregold.

New plan was read a book and drink coffee. Double perfect.  Explore the place when it's not so hot.  So I did.  I took pleasure sipping in some "cold" latte with few cubes of ice floating almost fading away fast, and doubly disappears as I stir the drink with my straw.  For 140 bucks I expected more from this drink.  It seemed that they were running out of ice because apparently there wasn't any electricity so I had to make do with a place with no air condition.  The only consolation amongst all these is that the tiles in the store was deliciously beautiful, more like the one I saw in Marikina's church, with Mediterranean patterns painted in green and yellow, finished off with a Matte layer.  It was simply art on the floor.  I was reading, at the same time taking glimpse at the floor and reveled in the magnificence of it, thinking to myself again and again that that's definitely going to be the tiles on my dream house, the same thoughts I had the first time I saw it at the church.

With my cellphone shutting down because I failed to charge it last night, I resort to going at the nearest computer shop to call off another meeting I have planned to go to at 3pm in Ortigas.  It was some maum meditation discussion offered free by an enthusiast at meet up.com.  I left a private message hoping she had read it even before going out of her place to meet me.  When that was done, I then opened google and typed in the search box: places to go in calamba.  It didn't take me long to find out that Rizal's place and the church where he was baptized were nearby.  Ok so I had my destinations, now what to eat? Surprisingly there wasn't anything that was presented to me that's authentically from Calamba.  In fact, I was disappointed that the first entry was but a famous Chinese resto,  Few entries after that are vietnamese and thai.  What is happening?  So I forgot about the food and logged out and started my way to the Jose Rizal Shrine.

Image Source: lakadpilipinas

Image Source: Wikipedia

When I got there, I was of course excited.  The floor inside was the same ones you'll find at old museums.  Red, square this one has apparently encaved more than the other ones I saw. This one feels authentic. Promising. I smiled and silently congratulated myself for turning a disaster to another adventure.  Good job shy!  There were coins with his face on it.  There were some medals of some sorts.  Some writings of his on the wall.  Not original but blown up ones.

Image Source: Marili

 When I went upstairs, I saw some ropes limiting people to get a more intimate distance to the chairs, and beds displayed.  Even from afar, I knew that those weren't really old relics.  They may have some vintage flair into it, but I doubt that these belongs to the original house of the National hero.  I frowned, but at the same time found it funny that other people were excited about it, taking selfies here and there. I felt wise enough not to.  Why would I? These aren't even original, I hurriedly walk past from room to room, every room just confirms my suspicion. Then I went down and finally out of the house.  Well that was a disappointment, I hope the church isn't.

Image Source: nicerioadventures

So just across the street, I got in the church.  Before that I saw this guy, with broken wrist, his right hand seemed to be hyperflexed in a strange way, it looks definitely twisted oddly.  He was limping his way towards a faucet found at one of the 2 candle ponds.  The one you find where there was 3 row of circular metal bwire which holds in candle stands.  Immediately below it is a pond  with melted wax in different colors, taking shapes in some kaleidescopic array.  The guy gave me an eerie feel, like some kind of the hunchback of notre dame.  I swore I might have stopped on my gait on the sight of him.  I hope he didn't see the shock on my face.

I tried to compensate my shockness with me continuing my pace inside the church and ignoring him as if he was normal.  I should have done better.

It's the same feel that any old churches has.  Same elements with a bell tower and same old architecture. It just seemed more dark near the altar.  I wanted to go near but the benches aligned in a straight row barricaded the pathway.  Looking afar, I saw a janitor mopping the floor near the altar.  It was probably general cleaning day.  So I prayed along with 2 other locals praying 4 , 10 bleachers behind me.

This day wasn't disastrous over all.  It does pay to be kind to self ad open to other possibilities.  I should continue this.  I took a deep breath, smiled and look once more at the Jose Rizal Shrine and left.

But I wish I wasn't so judgemental and critical about everything.  I would have stayed in their a little while longer because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be back in that place anymore.

This teaches me to just enjoy and appreciate the things as they are. 

 

Publisher: Shy - Sunday, November 09, 2014

Posting Funny Postcards

I've really had a good laugh with this.  This personalized e cards had totally improved.  I used to have this as gifs but now, they have it in full blown vids!

I used jibjab and even though they only have 1 free entry, it's fine.  That free one seemed to be in great quality and very much entertaining.

Sorry if I can't be able to show to you the videos because I have to pay for me to be able to Download.

But this challenge is done.

Publisher: Shy - Thursday, November 06, 2014

My Journey to 30

I've exactly a month before I'll turn 30 and looking back I think I did pretty well.  Not perfect but ok, just well enough to start what I've always wanted to start but isn't really quite there yet.  So here is a post to finally make it count.

As they say we all get into the doing when we're under pressure and am I so under that now.  I've got 1 month left to scratch off as much as I can, a number of things I've always wanted to happen before I turn 30 and I try as best as I can, in all of my ability to scratch one item a day.  So from here on end until my birthday on the 6th of December, I'll be posting 1 entry a day to talk about just that.

Enjoy.

And good luck to me.

Publisher: Shy - Wednesday, November 05, 2014