Ok, so here's the thing. At some point in life, people do get stuck or reach a plateau for a year or even more, and they just cannot seem to have anything going for them. And I happen to know this, because I've been to that god-forsaken pit for the longest time. Don't even bother to ask me how long or I'll just have a momentary regret why it took me so long to finally take action. That, my friend, is my main purpose of me writing this.
Why people remain stagnant is because they haven't realized that they are. They go on with life, wake up at 7am-ish, eat breakfast, go to work, get back home at 6pm, hang around with the family, sleep. and the next day would practically be the same thing, all 5 days of the week and the situation would probably be the case for next week and all the weeks in their lifetime. Good for you if you have climbed up the corporate ladder, or have successfully expanded your businesses two-folds or three-folds. These people have thought of how to be bigger and better. They have moved on and have tried to reached for higher grounds. But for the people who managed to stay on the same goddamn work, with the same goddamn salary, they are what I call the mediocre. They get satisfied with what life has to offer, thinking that 'I'm good if I have a job, and I get a monthly salary, it may not be that enough but I'll work with it'. They haven't realized what's out there, what's more, what's possible or if they have, they don't feel capable of achieving it.
Third, is when they are busy fixing other people's problems, and lives that they have no more time and energy to fix their own. They are having a crisis and their lives are now meant to serving others instead of serving themselves. Most housewives are guilty of this, in that they allot 100% of themselves to their family thinking that it is the right thing to do. Or the dedicated employee who cannot leave his job because he owes a lot to his employers, or that loyal girlfriend or boyfriend who thinks that grabbing better opportunities abroad would mean end of the relationship. These are what I call the lambs because they sacrifice their dreams in service or out of love for other people.
4. The Victim
The victims. These are the people who experienced tragedy and great downfall and are not able to pick themselves up again. Life for them is a long dramatic tale of them being abused, harassed, thrown away and dragged down. They are the underdogs, who get twisted satisfaction from sympathy of others, validating what they have led themselves to believe that they are 'helpless and that they need help.' With a mindset like that, would you even think that applying for a managerial position would be part of their train of thoughts?
5. The young-at-heart
And lastly, we have the young-at-heart or the youngsters who feel that they have so much time in the world, that getting serious with life would have to be done when they are already in their 30's. They don't have that sense of urgency because they are too caught up on being young, wild and free.
I was a little bit of these 5. And maybe I still am. I too, got satisfied with the flexibility and simplicity of my work, too scared to make mistakes that I would regret forever, too focused with my then-relationship, too heartbroken and victimized after the breakup, but I've always felt the urgency, especially when I turned 27.
Here's what I've learned that I wished I had known earlier on.
First is to always invest on identity value by acquiring skills and knowledge that would boost your morale and increase your perceived value of yourself. And always, I mean always, keep moving towards your dreams.
Second, is one can never be too sure what lies ahead, but nothing really beats doing your research and knowing what's true for you and fighting for it. If it feels good deep inside your guts, it must be right.
Third, if they love you, they would set you free or that they would let you do your dreams and support you. Love yourself first because that's how people would see your value and would learn to respect you more. If your cup is full, then you have more energy and love to give to your loved ones.
Fourth, get on with it. Sure tragedy kicked your ass countless times. You were betrayed and lied on or even cheated. Grieve if you have to, but for Christ sake, put a tab on it, dust yourself off and move ahead. You can never move on by crying it out because I tell you, tears will always fall and it won't stop unless you stop repeating that dramatic story in your head. Shut it off, and tune in to a brighter story which you deserve.
Fifth, you can never be too young to dream. When I was still at school, I didn't spend a lot of thought on myself and on what I wanted to do because my immediate goal then was just to finish school. Fail.
So for the mediocre in us, I say, improve and never stop learning.
For the perfectionist, let go and experiment.
For the lamb, learn to love yourself first; indulge every now and then.
For the victim, you don't exist, so shut up!
For that playful child, dream early and be sure to make it a reality!
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